


Loss Makes A Sorrowful Companion

by brahe



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Bones is there to pick up the pieces, Jim cares about everyone too much, Pre-Slash, i guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-16
Updated: 2015-02-16
Packaged: 2018-03-13 07:11:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3372476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brahe/pseuds/brahe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The crew is Jim's family, and death hits him hard.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Loss Makes A Sorrowful Companion

**Author's Note:**

> So this is just a little (really little) something I wrote about Jim and how he reacts to crew deaths and his reliance on Bones. It's nothing much, but I might expand on it eventually. Who knows. Anyway, enjoy

Jim's inability to take no as an answer made each and every death of a crew member that much worse. He worked himself past the point of exhaustion to keep them safe and alive, and whenever they lost one, it left him empty.

  
Bones was the only one from whom he ever sought comfort. Their years together at the Academy and the surprising similarities of their pasts gave them a deep understanding of one another that allowed for a rare type of bond for form between them.

  
They had just lost an ensign to an oil fire that broke out in part of engineering. Bones entered his quarters, weary from work and sorrow, when quiet crying caught his ear. He wished he didn't recognize the sound.

  
Every time someone died, Bones found Jim wrapped up in his bed, waiting for the doctor to return to his room. And every time, Bones would climb into bed next to his captain, his best friend, and hold him till the shaking stopped and the tears subsided.

The CMO asked him once what it felt like, and Jim replied in a voice hoarse from crying that it felt like a someone was trying to rip out his heart while a thousand-ton weight sat on his chest. Bones didn't ask any more questions after that; he knew what that felt like.

  
And though sometimes the others would ask Jim if he was okay, Bones knew better. The real answer is no, despite the reassurance that "Yeah, I'm fine" and the fake smile. But no one has the time and no one has the experience to understand what he's going through. You can't describe in a single sentence what it feels like to lose a member of your family.

  
There was the odd occasion when someone would ask Bones if he was alright, and he'd say he was. After all, he wasn't the one that was up crying for weeks after (despite the few tears he shed that disappeared Jim's hair that was tucked under his chin). While the death of a crew member hurt, it hurt more to see the crumbled ruin it left the captain in.

  
Bones wished he was so well acquainted.


End file.
